A couple of years ago I met Dr. T.H., an engaging chiropractor and alternative healer from Wisconsin who’d moved to Florida for the summer. We explored issues from self-actualization to hot politics. One of the topics that he brought up was deception. He referenced some behaviors as deceptive that we might all consider matter of fact: wearing makeup, posting a pic of yourself on a dating website that’s from ten or twenty years ago, or even painting your fingernails. Certainly cosmetic surgery would fall into the mix of deceptive tactics we might use to become more sexually alluring.
If you consider these moves, they’re all ways of changing appearances and maximizing attractiveness. In the film Beautiful Daughters, Eve Ensler interviews a group of transgender women. This topic really pushes the envelope and brings us to another aspect of deception: acceptance.1
Some deceptions are revealed to us while others remain hidden. What do we think about financial institutions and businesses keeping two sets of books: one for public disclosure and one incorporating the true business facts. Of course, this is not only deceptive it’s illegal. But, it’s been cited as true by more than one source since the 2008 financial meltdown.
How do we feel about deceptive words? A “no fly zone” actually means bombing; it doesn’t simply mean that you cannot fly in or out of the area.
And, what about withholding information? Does this make us angry, or do we have a fear of rejection, so we behave by withholding from others? Are we attempting to manipulate an outcome, and if so, why don’t we trust ourselves with the truth?
When we experience self-love, compassion and self-acceptance, this strength will not only dissolve the grosser deceptions, but also the finer ones that Dr. T.H. so boldly expressed. We all have the strength and potential to live free and firm in our true selves.
- Aronson, Josh and Jordon, Ariel Orr. Beautiful Daughters. MTV Logo Network, 2006. Film.